The LMAO thread!

[winstoncds]

Two six-year-old boys are standing in the toilet having a pee.
One turns to the other and says, “Your dinky doesn’t have any skin on it.”
“That’s because I’ve been circumcised,” he replies.
“Cor! What does that mean?”
“It means the skin’s been cut off the end.”
“How old were you when they did that?”
“About two days old.”
“Did it hurt?”
“It sure did. I didn’t walk for a year.”

[winstoncds]

Instead of sending two convicted drug dealers to jail, the
judge decides to give them both 250 hours of community
service.
“You will work in a drug rehabilitation centre, explaining to
those poor addicts the evils of drug abuse. After your
sentence you will return to me with a full report of your
work.”
The two drug dealers carry out the judge’s wishes and return
to him at the end of their sentence.
“How did it go?” the judge asks the first man.
“I managed to get 31 people off drugs,” he replies.
“Well done, and how did you manage that?”
“I drew two circles – one large and one small. I told them the
large circle was the size of their brain before drugs, and the
small circle was what their brain would be like after drugs.”
The judge then asks the second man how he did.
“I got 200 people off drugs,” he replies.
“But that’s staggering,” says the judge. “How did you manage
that?”
“Well, I drew two pictures – a small circle and a large circle.
I showed them the small circle first and told them that was
their arsehole before going into prison …”

[winstoncds]

What google thinks of facebook.

[prathambhatnagar]

LMAO....ultimate yaar ultimate...

[alanjg]

how is this...

[prathambhatnagar]

I THINK GOOGLE IS JUST JEALOUS OF FB N TWITTER...

[winstoncds]

An old Italian Mafia Don is dying and he calls for his grandson to
approach the bed. "Lissin a me. I wanna for you to taka my chrome-plated
.38-caliber revolver so you will always remember me."
The grandson smiles weakly and replies, "But Grandpa, I really dona
lika guns. Howz 'bout you leava me you Rolex watch instead?"
Gasping for air, the old man answers with a snarl in his voice,
"Shuddup ana lissin. Somma day you gonna runna da business. You gonna
have a beautifula wife, lotsa money, a biga home, and maybea couple ah
little bambinos."
After a slight pause to catch his breath he continues, "Somma day
you gonna comma home and maybe finda you wife inna bed with another
man. Whadda you gonna do then...pointa to your watch and say 'Time's
up?'

[alanjg]

lovely...lol..

[alanjg]

Little Johnny's teacher got up in front of the class and announced they were going to play a guessing game! The teacher said, "I have something behind my back. It's red in color and round. It's soft, but it's hard."

Johnny raised his hand and said, "I know, it's a red rubber ball." The teacher said, "No Johnny, it's an apple, but I like the way that you think."

The teacher grabbed another object and put it behind her back. "I have something behind my back. It's orange in color and round. It's soft, but it's hard," said Johnny's teacher.

Johnny raised his hand again and said, "Teacher teacher, I know, it's an orange rubber ball." The teacher looked at Johnny and said, "No Johnny, it's an orange, but I like the way that you think."

Johnny was now getting the hang of it so he asked the teacher if he could try one. Johnny grabbed an object and put it behind his back and said, "I have something behind my back. It's pink in color and it's loooong. It's soft, but it's haaaard."

The teacher, getting upset, yelled at Johnny, "Now Johnny, I'm going to have to tell the principal about this perverted behavior." Johnny stopped her and said, "But, teacher, all I have is my pink eraser - but I like the way you think!"

[prathambhatnagar]

^^hahahahahaha